All the Best,

Nancy

With all that said, my husband and I do pretty good at making room for mini-breaks in our lives even if only for a fleeting few minutes or hours.  Still, we allowed  too many years to slip by before we took our an extended break from the world.  We tried to get away in 2008 but our house sitter fell through at the last minute (which meant a painful vacation rental deposit forfeiture in addition to the disappointment of it all…Grrrrrr).

Back to our recent “escape” from reality…. for 11 days, it was just the two of us…no work travels, no client calls, no horses, donkeys, dogs, cats to feed, tend to, no tense or toxic communications to survive…in other words, none of the normal twists and turns of our busy lives (Okay..I admit I did a little bit of twittering and email replying but it was truly a very little for me!).  And our vacation was truly wonderful from start to finish…perhaps the vacation life style we lived would be boring to many people as we didn’t run ourselves to death trying to see the sights, try out new restaurants or other typical vacation activities for many……we just stayed put as “they” say.  With the ocean as our backdrop, we hunkered down with plenty of food, books, good music, rocking chairs and movies.  TV was an option but was rarely turned on.  Ditto re my laptop.  It was quiet, restful, healing, uplifting and basically like one long, slow 11-day deep breath! Excuse the redundancy, but it truly was a rare and greatly appreciated “time off for good behavior” for both of us.

My wish for you — If you’re like us, you have a zillion excuses of why you can’t take an extended vacation.  I encourage you to re-ponder this one.  I admit it can be a pain in the ol’ wazoo making all the decisions regarding just HOW you’ll pull it off, where and when to go, finding a way to do it within tight budgets, coordinating house sitters, if needed, for  indoor pets, (and barn sitters for horse and donkey nuts like us), planning ahead work-wise, packing,loading, unpacking, unloading, etc., etc….but as we again learned, it is SO worth the effort.

For 11 blissful days, we were able to reacquaint and renew our bonds with ourselves and each other without the normal interruptions and diversions of our busy lives…. we had un-rushed moments to better reflect upon this wonderful journey on earth called life, the good and not-so-good people relationships in our lives,  important decisions-t0-be-made that were on our plate….to read books some of which had been in our to-be-read piles for years….to talk and walk together in conversation or silence…..to just be still.

One of my recent posts about the potential consequence of health care procrastination coupled with this one reflects my personal efforts during 2009 at ending at least some of my unwise procrastination habits.  Most of us are experts when it comes to procrastination from years of honing our delay tactic skills.  By the way, a great book on this subject was written many years ago by Dr. Linda Sapadin…while I haven’t read any of her newer books (again, procrastination’s my only excuse), I suspect they are as worthwhile to read as her first book, It’s About Time
The 6 Styles of Procrastination and How to Overcome Them. To this day, I recommend this book to my clients and seminar groups.  It is well written and as an aside, I decided I was guilty of practicing all 6 style of procrastination as described by Dr. Sapadin…I read it initially merely as an additional resource for my clients and workshop groups…and as many of these folks would tell you how it did indeed help them…however, it ended up being a very wise book for me to read for personal reasons and I highly recommend it to you.

I encourage you to do a private self-audit of any areas of your professional and personal life where your delayed health, relationship and/or stress management procrastination may be playing with fire so to speak.  We know when we are about to hit bottom or are in the midst of burnout whether we admit it to others or not or worse, we try to deny it ourselves.  And we know when we are flirting dangerously with ignored health matters and/or vacation deprivation.  I love being with family and friends, I am blessed with a career and business nurtured from my passions, I find peace  and comfort from the outside world within the loving arms of family and the joys of living on a small ranch with our sweet herd of 4-legged family members …BUT…still my husband and I needed a break – big time!  We all do…..breaks from all the good things in our lives and certainly from the not-s0-good …. time to de-stress, be still, play …. time to renew ourselves, our attitudes and our souls.

If this is an area of your life that might need more attention and less procrastination, then I wish you all the best as you make “it” happen.

With wishes for  plenty of “rocking chair” moments,

Nancy

What we don’t hear as much about, statistically or otherwise, are the more subtle impairments that many people have. A few root causes of the more subtle impairments to our mental (and physical) health include: chronic workaholism; addictions to our high tech tools; ongoing sleep deprivation; obesity; food allergies and intolerances; irregular or no exercise regiment; sexual or other harassment such as office bullying; burnout; long-term excessive stress loads; and the stubborn denial skills many folks have regarding all of the above.

Thinking right now how lucky you are NOT to have any addictions? Good for you unless of course you’re overlooking being overly attached to your tech “tools”. With brutal honesty, think back to your out of the office hours last night or last weekend. How frequently did you check your mobile phone, Blackberry or PDA for messages? How many work-related text messages or emails did you send? How often do you check for messages while supposedly “listening” to others?

Acknowledging and taking steps to address mental health concerns can be very difficult for many people. Instead, they resort to out-dated mindsets that push these types of problems under the rug, too embarrassing or sensitive to be discussed and certainly not shared with others. That traditional and naïve mode of thought feeds the destructive fires of denial and contributes to the damages caused by ignored mental health addictions and other impairments.

Do you personally have any problems with alcohol, other drug abuse or depression that you are not squarely facing? What about the quality of your diet, exercise regimen and sleep? Are there any exhausting stresses on your plate that have been there for a long time? Do you want those same stresses on your plate this time next year? If not, make a list today (for your eyes only) of what steps you can start taking to ensure they won’t be.

Is there anyone in your office showing signs of an existing mental impairment or at a high risk for developing an addiction? What is being done to help them, to ensure clients are not harmed in any manner, and to protect other employees?

Office Impairment Policies

Do you have a written impairment policy in your office? If so, is it current, followed, known and understood by all attorneys and staff?  How do you hold attorneys and staffs accountable if they fail to comply with your policy?

An effective mental impairment policy includes many basic components. First, it defines the mental impairment issues that the policy addresses. Second, it teaches about and explains the signs of mental impairment. Third, it tells employees how to handle a situation when they suspect or know of a co-worker’s or a client’s addiction or problem. Fourth, an office policy outlines how employees will be held accountable if they fail to report mental impairment incidents which could harm a client’s matter, another employee or do other damage. Fifth, the policy should include what resources, if any, the firm offers to employees with mental impairment challenges along with information on local external resources. Finally, the policy should address the firm’s confidentiality policy regarding these types of matters. Of course, the policy can be much broader than the minimal inclusions discussed above.

A written firm policy on mental impairment raises the awareness level of all employees, reflects the firm’s commitment to maintaining the highest level of legal services and ethics, acknowledges the firm’s intolerance for drug or alcohol abuse and the efforts and resources it offers employees needing assistance with mental impairment issues. Here’s just part of what a well written mental impairment policy says about your law firm: our integrity, commitment to clients and respect for them and our high standards for providing excellent services will not under any circumstances be compromised.

Plentiful Resources

The resources available for help with these matters are plentiful. From bar association programs to private therapists to online help and community outreach options, we have an endless number of resources from which to choose. A good place to start is with your local community, your state’s bar association and the ABA’s Commission on Lawyer Assistance Programs (COLAP) at http://www.abanet.org/legalservices/colap/ or by calling 1-800-285-2221, Ext. 5359. Also, ask other attorneys how they handle these issues and if they would share a copy of their firm’s impairment policy.

Two More Reminders …..

(1) Firm leaders should consider making at least a portion of employees’ vacation time mandatory for all employees each year. Likewise, they need to set good examples of the importance of living balanced professional and personal lives.

(2) Firms should hold stress management/quality of life/mental health workshops at least twice a year for all employees or send them to quality programs offered by other groups. The firm will benefit tremendously from providing this type of education to employees (e.g. higher productivity, fewer absences, reduced stress and improved morale to name a few). In addition, your professional liability and medical insurance providers will applaud you and hopefully offer discounts for your efforts. And if not, check out their competition before applying for re-issuances of your policies.

Courage, fortitude, persistence, awareness, initiative, respectfulness and wisdom. By honing these characteristics in our own lives, we can be a part of the solution rather than keeping our heads in the sand or worse, our becoming one of the statistical nightmares.

Only some of our colleagues suffer from the more serious mental health challenges. But “some” is way too many. Each one of us is responsible for protecting ourselves, our employees and our great profession from the dangers of ignored mental health impairments. A great place to start is with the creation and implementation of a well thought out firm policy on mental health impairment. Equally essential is that we all take an honest, complete look in the mirror and that we get busy “fixin” whatever needs attention in our own lives and lifestyles.

An NBJ article on this same subject was published in 2008 by Lawyers USA

RT@TulsaBankruptcy Wishing you a happy & safe 4th of July. How about some Recession Fireworks? http://tinyurl.com/lbzqqo

Great cartoon although the painful truth behind it is sad.  I wish you and yours a 4th of July weekend that’s full of fun, good times with family and friends and a safe one.  Also hope we all take time to reflect on why we celebrate this special day in the history of our great country.  And, as we enjoy the surprise, beauty and excitement of all the firework shows this weekend, I for one am going to make some quiet time to think about any “fireworks” that I may be creating within my office and family….even if they are relatively small ones, I am committed to defusing it (or them) asap.  We can create personal fireworks in as many ways as pyrotechniciams can design exciting firework shows for us.  Some examples would be:

• blowing a gasket before we have all the facts about a situation;
• assuming the worse as only a true drama king or queen knows how to do;
• talking excessively loud in a restaurant or other public place;
• raising a ruckus over a really minor event in the big scheme of things;
• taking the most extreme, formal steps to settle a conflict with a colleague, family member, another individual or entity before trying to resolve the matter via alternative dispute options (e.g. plain old fashion sit down and talk session; mediation, etc.)
• last minute chaos at work or home due to our own lack of planning;
• yelling at our kids or spouses for small “stuff” after being professionally polite all day those certifiably real bullies in our workplace;
• being the office troublemaker….you know the type…they LOVE to keep trouble stirred up among the troops, they relish look for the failings of others and are almost always the ones who are super defensive whenever their mistakes are duly noted;
• publicly reacting to what employees did wrong, but rarely acknowledging all they’ve done right (When I’m right, who remembers and when I’m wrong, who the heck forgets?!); and
• overreacting to any hint of a problem, challenge or unexpected change in plans.

This is, of course, just a starter list off the top of my head so I encourage all of us to make a list of the destructive kind of “fireworks” that we personally may be imposing upon those around us.  If we are being brutally honest with ourselves and discover a few “explosive” habits that could stand some changing, let’s  fix it…..we can’t control a lot of the things that happen in our lives, but we can ensure that the only fireworks in our lives are those we enjoy on the 4th of July, New Year’s Eve, and other international celebrations.

Have a super, safe and fantastic weekend ahead and as always, thanks for stopping in for a few minutes…your comments and input are always welcome and enjoyed!

Nancy

The End(s!)